Gift of being guiltless

Source: elfwood.com

It seems time is passing quiet fast and the things of course have changed a lot. I am now listening to everything that happens around me both with my concern and without, taking note of everything, learning on the realities, worrying at them, at times accepting them as they and at all instances, am being quiet. There would be no other best thing in this world than being what you are and to get the ones who still love you with your weaknesses and to make a lovely life with them. When I talk about the reality, I do really doubt how many people actually showing their real faces when they pass us on a road, when they smile, and at all cases there is a possibility where two or more people meet. I am bored of looking at these artificial faces who smile for money, status and for other material things. Two months ago, I had been in Jaffna my hometown; I was actually looking for the innocent faces, the real smile they had and for the people who were with me in my past and the beautiful memories that they left. However, it has taken time for me to realize that the Jaffna in my mind was there several years back, what is being there now is just a place, and the guiltless has gone far away from them. But I know, this is not a thing that can be criticized because they all are made to change like that and yes, now I even have changed or most probably, I am made to change like that. I now have learned how to smile, walk, and talk and to do everything in an artificial way and this cannot be complained at all because this world doesn’t allow real innocent people to be such always. But I do remember, it is something like a small dot of light in a dark night, I met a girl in a bus when I was in Jaffna two months ago, who was about sixteen or seventeen years old. The bus was crowded and later, the woman who was sitting near to her seat had left and that girl touched my hands and told me to sit there. I just travelled around twenty minutes in that bus and she started talking to me like a person who knew me before. She gave me some peanuts, she talked about everything, about her family, how they came to Jaffna and about many things, and she was a pure village girl. As to what she said, she was in Vanni and due to the war, they displaced to Jaffna, and she had lost two of her sisters in war and now there are only three people in her family. She told that there was a best friend to her who looks just as me, and now having no contacts with her due to that they are separated due to the war. She had written the O/Level examination and told that she really love to study further but there was a serious shadow in her face, which doubted whether she could do it as they even suffer to make having their lunch everyday. I just got her number; I know I cannot help her now but in future will see if I can help her, I said bye and got down from the bus and till the bus went so far, she was smiling at me. I am sure that she was sad to say bye for me, a person who just talked to her for twenty minutes. Mm.but I don’t know whether she will be the same after some years later also, will she? Will this world allow her to be so?